OK, let's meme it again. Bring it.
Jan. 19th, 2006 08:21 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
chaosvizierBehold, The Top Five Meme!
You post a topic, list, category, whatever, in my comments section (Top Five People I'd Like To Kill, Top Five Musical Pieces Ever Written, etc.). Then, in a separate post, I'll post the answers to all your Top 5 ideas, according to me. Then you post this offer in your own journal.
EDIT: Fuck a separate post. I'll answer here and now. Instant gratification for all!
You post a topic, list, category, whatever, in my comments section (Top Five People I'd Like To Kill, Top Five Musical Pieces Ever Written, etc.). Then, in a separate post, I'll post the answers to all your Top 5 ideas, according to me. Then you post this offer in your own journal.
EDIT: Fuck a separate post. I'll answer here and now. Instant gratification for all!
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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Date: 2006-01-19 01:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 03:14 pm (UTC)4. Ben Stiller/Adam Sandler. To me they are the same person. The same annoying person. They deserve the royal foot-in-groin treatment.
3. Saddam Hussein. I just think that would be cool. "Did you just boot Saddam in the head?" - "I DID!"
2. Pat Robertson. Every time the man opens his mouth, it's like Pandora's Box Redux. I want to be the one to close that mouth. With my foot.
1. Paris Hilton/Nicole Richie. The Simple Life needs my simple foot in its simple head. The world will be a better place when this stomping occurs.
Honourable Mention: The Rock. Actually, I like Dwayne. He's cool. I just want to be badass enough to kick his ass, just so I can say "I BEAT UP THE ROCK I AM SO BADASS."
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Date: 2006-01-19 01:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 03:25 pm (UTC)4. Sci-Fi. Yeah, I'm a sucker for cheesy sci-fi. And, granted, a lot of the sci-fi channel is made entirely of cheese. Bad cheese. But I cannot resist its cheesy lure.
3. Whatever station is playing Law And Order. Could be NBC, USA, TNT, who knows. It could be all three simultaneously.
2. Cartoon Network. Even though a lot of the "modern" toons they show are crap, they have some gems sprinkled throughout, not the least of which is "Adult Swim".
1. Comedy Central. It has given rise to some of my favorite shows of all time, and does its fair share in pushing the envelope, most notably with "South Park".
Honourable Mention: HBO. Deadwood and Rome are wonderful things. HBO Direct or whatever it's called is useful. Plus, boobies.
(no subject)
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Date: 2006-01-19 01:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 03:36 pm (UTC)4. There was a time when I liked waterslides. And in Portugal, on vacation, we were near this huge waterpark with some of the longest and wildest waterslides I've ever been on. We spent entire days just riding the same rides.
3. Superman, Six Flags Great Adventure, New Jersey. The suspended "flight" position makes this one interesting, especially with the giant loop. Critical to be in the front row, though.
2. Nitro, Six Flags Great Adventure, New Jersey. That first drop's a doozy; that's all I gotta say.
1. Kingda Ka, Six Flags Great Adventure, New Jersey. The culmination of magnetic accelerator-based rides. I actually thought my contacts were going to be ripped from my eyes by sheer force. All other rides must bow down to this one.
Honourable Mention: While I've never actually been on it, there's a ride down in Disneyworld or Epcot or Universal or something where you're travelling through the human body. Apparently it has the highest puke-factor rate in the park. You have to respect that.
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Date: 2006-01-19 01:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 03:46 pm (UTC)4. The Sound Of Music. While perhaps slightly annoying, you cannot deny its ubiquitous nature. I bet dollars to donuts that right now, as you read this, somewhere in your brain a neuron is singing "THE HILLS ARE ALIVE; HOW I HATE THIS SO-ONG!"
3. The Phantom Of The Opera. Not the movie; the real musical. The movie is for posers.
2. Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. You know, I said "Quoi?" when I first laid eyes on this musical. It seemed like such an odd movie to remake in musical format. Wonder no more. It was funny as fuck all.
1. Les Miserables. The story is fun. The songs are excellent. A lot of people die. French people, no less. What's not to like?
Honourable Mention: Spamalot. The essence of Monty Python And The Holy Grail, revised and reformatted for the musical stage, and delivered with the same insane exuberance that the original film cast had when the movie was made. Well-done.
Mwahahaha.
Date: 2006-01-19 01:57 pm (UTC)Re: Mwahahaha.
Date: 2006-01-19 02:30 pm (UTC):P
That's tough to grade...
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From:no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 02:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 04:49 pm (UTC)4. Fall, 2005: France criticizes US response to Katrina disaster, then promptly is paralyzed by two weeks of rioting in its capital city. Irony is staggering.
3. Molly Ringwald mauled by a vicious bear. OK, that never really happened, but I'm holding out hope.
2. The entire "Sex Education" episode of South Park. Butters playing the part of The Humongous from The Road Warrior is worth platinum.
1. Bill Cosby: Himself. People think the Cos is old news and barely worth his weight in pudding. Go back to the good old days and remember this.
Dishonourable Mention: Jar-Jar Binks. Supposed to provide "hilarity" and "amusement" to Star Wars Episode I. Failed in a way that has never before been matched throughout history.
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Date: 2006-01-19 02:27 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 04:56 pm (UTC)4. "Sorry; expensive food makes me gassy."
3. "Your eyes are beautiful. I'd love to add them to my collection."
2. "Nice to meet you; my name's George W. Bush."
1. "Nice tits. Wanna fuck?" This probably is equally bad if you date is male OR female.
Honourable Mention: "Do you have a hotter sister/brother?"
no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 02:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 05:02 pm (UTC)5. Livejournal
4. Livejournal
3. Livejournal
2. Livejournal
1. More Livejournal
But I'll take the high road.
5. Livejournal. Because, let's face it, it's true. And not just for me, I'm sure. I'll lump a few other internet diversions here, like any kind of IM, and the generic "checking your email" concept.
4. Nap. Ok, this doesn't happen at work, but at home, when there's stuff to do, sometimes the bed just looks so comfy...
3. Eat. "Hmmm, I could do this assignment now, or I could go eat a Reeses Peanut Butter Cup. Oh chocolate-peanut butter goodness, how do you taste so good?"
2. Go away. "I need to... go to the mall. To get... stuff. Important stuff. Yeah. Now."
1. Gaming. If I'm at home, I'd much rather conquer the world Civilization style than, say, clean the bathroom. This is fact. At work... well, let's just say I have beaten Expert-level Minesweeper in 102 seconds. That's how much practice I have.
Honourable Mention: OK, let's give Livejournal another hit, because, well, it's a timesink.
no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 02:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 05:26 pm (UTC)4. "So... you have any other hot daughters I might be interested in?"
3. "I guess she takes after her father's side. Good thing, too."
2. "Nice tits. Wanna fuck?" Because, you know, that's just never appropriate for any situation.
1. "You know, this reminds me of that time we were having sex in your room..."
Honourable Mention: "Thank you for the therapy bills that you have unknowingly inflicted upon us."
OK that's it- no trip to England for you!
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Date: 2006-01-19 02:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 03:12 pm (UTC)This'll be a long one...
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Date: 2006-01-19 03:17 pm (UTC)See, now you're forcing me to lie. Kinda.
Date: 2006-01-19 06:44 pm (UTC)4. Kurt Russell (this is the movie, not the show) is bad-ass. He beat up Lo Pan. No one in the Star Wars universe can say that.
3. The Force is pretty powerful, but you gotta respect the powers of MacGyver. Obi-Wan couldn't make a planet-killer bomb out of an old shirt, a newspaper, and duct tape.
2. Stargate happens NOW. And mostly HERE. None of this "long time ago" and "far far away" crap. Except... well, the stargate does take them far away, usually.
1. How To Go Really Really Far Away, Star Wars style: Get in to a barfight, argue with the ship's captain, get chased by stormtroopers, take off, get blockaded by Star Destroyers, and finally get the coordinates from the navicomputer to jump into hyperspace, only to arrive at your destination and find that the Death Star blew the fuck out of it.
How To Go Really Really Far Away, Stargate style: Walk through a big fancy circle. Emerge moments later. The destination is never blown the fuck up.
Fairness Counterpart: Mace Windu could singlehandedly take out the entire SG-1 team, and probably everything within three hundred miles of their location at any given point in time. Come on. It's Samuel L. Motherfucking Jackson.
Re: See, now you're forcing me to lie. Kinda.
From:no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 03:30 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 06:52 pm (UTC)4. Baskin Robbins' Cappuccino-Espresso Concerto ice cream. This is probably the best ice cream I can get access to in a moment's notice. Otherwise it would be South African Toblerone-flavored ice cream, because mmm boy, Toblerone. Hell, Toblerone itself can be dessert in my book.
3. Flan. Some kind of creme caramel dessert basted with yummy sauce. I could eat that until I dissolved into pudding.
2. Crepes Suzettes. Crepes, with fruity filling, ON FIRE!
1. Chocolate Mousse. The greatest and most chocolatey smooth dessert of all. When it's fluffy and yet still dense, that's when it's at its best. I would eat that until my body invented Types III-VII diabetes. Yes indeed.
Honourable Mention: Tiramisu. Well, I don't actually like it. I just like
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Date: 2006-01-19 03:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 07:46 pm (UTC)4. In a church. Mmmm, sacrelicious. But not on the altar- that's all hard marble stuff. In the confessionals, where it's softer.
3. I want to do it in a plane. Sure, it's no space shuttle, but hey, it'll do in a pinch. Especially now that business class has those full recliners. Mattress mambo is a go!
2. A museum. Extra points for having sex in The Met's Temple Of Dendur exhibit.
1. Outdoors- sex on the beach, on a summer night when it's warm and the ocean's a movin' and you are too... oh yeah. But bring a towel- sand is all scratchy and shit.
Honourable Mention: Don't just have sex in any old church. Go to the friggin' Vatican. That's top-notch.
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Date: 2006-01-19 05:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 07:54 pm (UTC)4. Grenada. They're a happy bunch of people. They have the relaxed Caribbean attitude down to a science. They're mellow and smiling and pleasant to deal with.
3. Kenya.
2. The Philippines. Mainly because their presence here is so universal. They're everywhere. I think there might be more Filipinos in NYC than in Manila itself.
1. Switzerland. The country consists entirely of good clocks, good cheese, delicious chocolate, and hot Swiss women. I could live there forever.
Honourable Mention: Japan. They're so tiny! And yet, secretly, they're all ninjas. I'm sure of this.
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Date: 2006-01-19 06:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 06:21 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2006-01-19 06:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 09:20 pm (UTC)4. The Amazon Rainforest/Jungle/River area. Sure, it comes with a lot of death, but it's pretty. And an ecosystem unmatched throughout the world.
3. Easter Island. There's something about those heads. I just wanna run up and give them noogies.
2. Alaska. The frozen north is still the beautiful scenic frozen north. Glaciers and salmon and moose, oh my! Oh, and Nelli too. ;-)
1. Japan. It's got a reputation. And even though they might no longer have real ninjas, I still want to see their birthplace.
Honourable Mention: New Zealand. Even though I've seen Middle Earth and Narnia on film, I want to see those places in person.
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Date: 2006-01-19 07:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-20 02:56 pm (UTC)4. Gaming. We're a good team. We have fun. And who else can say they beat Diablo II in 7.5 hours? Or at least, with any shred of pride? Not to mention game design... which one day we'll have in spades.
3. Partying. Who stops a party at midnight anyway? We're just getting started! We have staying power. 4 am! 5 am! Onward ho!
2. History. You cannot beat 12+ years of friendship. No way. It may be crazy, but it's EXTREME!
1. MIND LINK! Thinking the same thing at the same time is our trademark. And a symbol. Maybe just a symbol that there's one brain divided amongst the four of us... but whatever. It's all good.
Honourable mention: "Would you like THREE sushi boats this time?"
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Date: 2006-01-20 05:53 pm (UTC)9. "You wouldn't know smartass if a donkey was demonstrating quantum physics on a chalkboard."
8. "Fuhgeddaboudit!"
7. "Yeah, you just wish you could get come on your back."
6. "The only wit you'll get out of me is the one that comes in 'twit', you stupid twit."
5. "Fuck you!" Because, really, you can ALWAYS use that one.
4. "Top Ten? What do I look like, David Fucking Letterman?"
3. "I pity the fool that wants smartassery! My prediction for these comments? PAIN!"
2. "You can't handle the truth!" Can't go wrong with Jack Nicholson, after all.
And the number one smartass comeback I could make to this comment is...
*drumroll*
1. "Your mother." Always the right anwer. Always.
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Date: 2006-01-20 12:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-20 03:15 pm (UTC)4. Pestilence and Plague. Create a disease and the antidote. Unleash it. Make everyone bow down to you if they want health. Oh, and send your elite shock troops out to hunt down anybody naturally immune. Friggin' mutants.
3. Orbital Bombardment. With a net of satellites capable of shooting lasers with pinpoint accuracy, you can dominate the air and the surface with the classic threat of "Death From Above". Oh, and send your elite shock troops out to hunt down folks living in caves. Savages.
2. Nuclear Terror. Say you have nukes. Lots of nukes. And they're hidden in every major city on Earth. And you'll make them go boom if you're not put in charge. It'll help if you actually do have a few, just to set off in some crappy places like Mexico City and Paris. Oh, and send your elite shock troops out to hunt down every member of Greenpeace. Dirty hippies.
1. Groin Kicks. Every man on earth fears a good swift kick in the beanbag. And rightly so. If you train an army with the ability to deliver groin kicks on command, no one will stand against you except eunuchs and tough women. Trust me, that's what you have elite shock troops for.
Honourable Mention: Flash boobies everywhere. People will stand up and take notice, and probably obey whatever it was the boobies told them to do. No elite shock troops needed, unless they have good boobies to flash.
Oooh, this is a tough one.
Date: 2006-01-20 04:09 pm (UTC)5. "May the Force be with you." Say what you will about Star Wars, but EVERYONE knows this quote. Everyone.
4. "To be, or not to be: That is the question." While not everyone has read Hamlet, or even anything by Shakespeare, they can pinpoint this quote with near-unfailing accuracy.
3. "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." Again, the Golden Rule- known by all, regardless of religious orientation.
2. "I'll be back." Arnold Schwarzenegger gave some impressive staying power to these three little words.
1. "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind." First man on the moon? One of the greatest achievements in all of history? Oh yeah. Everyone knows this.
Honourable Mention: "If I wanted your opinion, I would have given it to you." Credited I believe to Samuel Goldwyn. More people need to heed his wisdom.
Now, things I like to say:
5. "I'll be back." Yes, Arnold is so boss that he makes both lists.
4. "Consequences, shmonsequences, as long as I'm rich." Daffy Duck summed up my human philosophy quite well.
3. "Lions and tigers and bears, oh my!" This quote is so easily adapted to any cluster of three things that it gets modified on a daily basis. Snippets and fragments and quotes, oh my!
2. "I pity the fool!" Mr. T pities all fools; I follow his lead.
1. "You can't handle the truth!" Jack Nicholson, "A Few Good Men". You simply can't get enough mileage out of this quote, I find.
Honourable Mention: "I had his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti. Thpthpthpthpthp." Anthony Hopkins, "The Silence Of The Lambs". Again, plenty of mileage can be gotten here.
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Date: 2006-01-23 05:53 pm (UTC)Another tough one...
Date: 2006-01-23 07:18 pm (UTC)4. Dead Poets Society: Neil commits suicide. Everyone in the late 80's and early 90's saw this movie. Probably more than once. This scene broke everyone's soul.
3. Monty Python And The Holy Grail: Well, to be fair, the entire movie could qualify in "Top Five Scenes" list, but everyone remembers the guardian of the Cave of Caer Bannagh: The Killer Rabbit.
2. Star Trek II: The Wrath Of Khan: Kirk screams in defiance, "KHAAAAAAAAAAAAN!" No explanation necessary.
1. The Exorcist: As the priests chant, young Regan, in bed, twists her head a full three hundred sixty degrees, all the while growling and cursing in that hideous voice. Copied in innumerable spoofs, but the horror factor at that time was unparallelled.
Honourable Mention: John Woo's The Killer: The final battle scene, as Chow Yun Fat and Danny Lee shoot about 255118 gangsters with about 983527773 bullets and destroy every last square inch of marble in the church they're hiding in.
Re: Another tough one...
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