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Dare: Accepted
Feb. 10th, 2022 09:51 pmI am not, at the core, a rational person. I do a lot of irrational things, think irrational thoughts, and say irrational words.
However, I do try to live up to my agreements, even if I made them in one of my more irrational moments.
( How irrational can I be, you ask? Click here and you'll find out! )
However, I do try to live up to my agreements, even if I made them in one of my more irrational moments.
( How irrational can I be, you ask? Click here and you'll find out! )
Not Quite A Movie Review
Jan. 31st, 2022 10:22 amSo, the other day I saw Disney's "Encanto" and it was great. There, that's my review. Great movie, and one of the few times where I actually enjoyed the songs in the movie.
But then I got to thinking (which is usually the part where I get in trouble), and I said to myself, "Self, this is a good wholesome family friendly Disney movie, but why can't it be a superhero movie?"
( To be fair, Disney owns Marvel, so my leap of logic isn't all THAT farfetched... Also, spoilers follow. )
But then I got to thinking (which is usually the part where I get in trouble), and I said to myself, "Self, this is a good wholesome family friendly Disney movie, but why can't it be a superhero movie?"
( To be fair, Disney owns Marvel, so my leap of logic isn't all THAT farfetched... Also, spoilers follow. )
Today I went to a funeral.
( This will not be uplifting, so skip to the end where there will be bunnies. )
As discussed, please find herewith bunnies.
( This will not be uplifting, so skip to the end where there will be bunnies. )
As discussed, please find herewith bunnies.
Where Everybody Knows Your Name: Entry One
Aug. 2nd, 2021 10:01 pmI have a story. I have many stories, but this one is exceptional even for me.
Content warning: going to a bar for drinky goodness.
( Rarely have I felt so welcomed as I did at the end of this tale. )
Content warning: going to a bar for drinky goodness.
( Rarely have I felt so welcomed as I did at the end of this tale. )
Combat with Chaos!
May. 9th, 2021 12:18 amAs mentioned not too long ago, I have three skills.
That's right, cooking was not one of them. However, this story is about one of my skills that does exist, much to everyone's surprise.
( I am both overqualified and underqualified at times. )
That's right, cooking was not one of them. However, this story is about one of my skills that does exist, much to everyone's surprise.
( I am both overqualified and underqualified at times. )
Cooking With Chaos!
May. 7th, 2021 01:08 pmI am a man of many skills.
Hahaha no, that's hyperbole, I have about three skills.
( Three might also be hyperbole but I'll give myself the benefit of the doubt here. )
Hahaha no, that's hyperbole, I have about three skills.
( Three might also be hyperbole but I'll give myself the benefit of the doubt here. )
Did I teach a class on Tuesday? Yes.
Did I accidentally hit myself on the bridge of the nose with my own weapons? Also Yes.
Did I continue teaching class even though I could feel blood streaming down the side of my nose and soaking into my mask while my students gazed in horror, unable to stop me? Also Also Yes.
Am I an unstoppable madman? Regrettably, also also also yes.
Did I accidentally hit myself on the bridge of the nose with my own weapons? Also Yes.
Did I continue teaching class even though I could feel blood streaming down the side of my nose and soaking into my mask while my students gazed in horror, unable to stop me? Also Also Yes.
Am I an unstoppable madman? Regrettably, also also also yes.
Mortal Movie Madness!
Apr. 25th, 2021 10:20 amAfter so many years, I'm getting back into the habit of movie reviews because I love movies. And if you remember anything about me, you know I love bad movies. So, without further ado...
MORTAL KOMBAAAAAAAAAT
( It was not a flawless victory. But it didn't finish me either. )
MORTAL KOMBAAAAAAAAAT
( It was not a flawless victory. But it didn't finish me either. )
Sure, everyone might be a bit surprised by yesterday's storytime, but you're all thinking "Oh come on, he does this every year, posts a thing and then disappears for a year. Yawn, boooooring." And that's fair. But this time it's different.
And sure, you're thinking "Hahaha yeah, you said that last year and the year before that and here we are," and that's fair too, I totally did.
But let's say that I've had some mental breakthroughs (and perhaps breakdowns) this past year, and I'm trying to get around to being a better version of me. That's maybe not totally accurate, but we'll run with it for now. So, let's recap, me in a nutshell.
Hurr hurr, I said 'nut'.
That's it. That's me, right there, making jokes like a 12 year old. You literally do not need to know anything else because that's probably 95% of my personality.7 But, if you really must know more...
( Ok, for greater detail I guess you can click on this cut tag. )
And sure, you're thinking "Hahaha yeah, you said that last year and the year before that and here we are," and that's fair too, I totally did.
But let's say that I've had some mental breakthroughs (and perhaps breakdowns) this past year, and I'm trying to get around to being a better version of me. That's maybe not totally accurate, but we'll run with it for now. So, let's recap, me in a nutshell.
Hurr hurr, I said 'nut'.
That's it. That's me, right there, making jokes like a 12 year old. You literally do not need to know anything else because that's probably 95% of my personality.7 But, if you really must know more...
( Ok, for greater detail I guess you can click on this cut tag. )
Do you want to answer questions?
Jul. 7th, 2020 10:53 pmNot serious questions, good heavens, no one wants that. Nope. But a fun filled trivia quiz, where the answers don't matter and the players' sassy, silly, or stumped replies are put on display instead. Points? Points are for chumps! Negative points is where it's at. If you want to play, just click here and it will bring you to this week's quiz. What have you got to lose? Play!
What Quizzes May Come
Apr. 1st, 2020 08:44 amA new Daily Quiz is up and running! Come on over and play and watch the fun go round.
(no subject)
Mar. 22nd, 2020 09:01 amMost of you on my feed have probably already seen this announcement, but I forgot to make it here so I'm just doing my due diligence:
LONG LIVE DWDQ!
Click here to learn more about how the Daily Quiz is about to return. You won't be disappointed!
Stay safe, stay well, and most of all, stay tuned!
LONG LIVE DWDQ!
Click here to learn more about how the Daily Quiz is about to return. You won't be disappointed!
Stay safe, stay well, and most of all, stay tuned!
New Year, Same Post
Jan. 10th, 2020 09:54 amBlah Blah Blah, I know, every year at the start of the year I post something like this. Last year I broke my arm so at least it was exciting. This year is just business as usual.
Tune in next whenever for when I actually blog again, haha, no really, this year I'm going to do it more. Really. Probably.
Tune in next whenever for when I actually blog again, haha, no really, this year I'm going to do it more. Really. Probably.
So, a while back I talked about Avengers: Infinity War, and how it was the culmination of a decade of Marvel movies that led up to the ultimate cliffhanger. So, how does said cliffhanger get resolved?
Let's find out!
CUE SPOILERS UNDER CUT, SO, YOU KNOW, FOREWARNED.
( Rocks fall, everyone dies. )
Let's find out!
CUE SPOILERS UNDER CUT, SO, YOU KNOW, FOREWARNED.
( Rocks fall, everyone dies. )
Damage Report!
Jan. 16th, 2019 02:44 pmSo, as a person who has never really broken a bone before, this broken arm thing is a fresh new experience for me. I just thought I'd ramble on about all those things that just don't work right here anymore. If you've done this before, then you know: THE STRUGGLE IS REAL.
0.5: TYPING. Before I start the real part of this list, let's be frank: I type a lot. With both hands, proper typing form and all that. Losing my right hand has led to...inaccuracies. So pardon any typos you see here; I've got one finger doing all the work of one hand and it will show.
1. LIFTING. I'm not a strong human being by any stretch of the imagination, but I can carry some weight if I need to. Surprise! Not any more! Any significant weight on this arm brings an equally significant amount of pain. Grocery bags? No deal. Winter jacket? Heavier than I thought. Laptop? CHUNKY. An add on to this category would be TWISTING or PULLING. If I keep my wrist stationary, nor problem, I can carry a glass of water without issue. BUT! If I have to pour water from a pitcher into the glass, now we have issues. Same with opening a door - turning the knob can be tricky, and then pulling the heavy door open with the hand twisted... nope. It's all up to Lefty.
2. EATING. I have, in the past week, missed my mouth with silverware more times than should ever be allowed. It's worse than Ted Stryker's drinking problem in "Airplane!" I suppose on the plus side it regulates my intake and slows me down when I want to shovel food into my gaping maw. Of course, non-silverware-requisite items like sandwiches and cookies are exempt from this issue. But two-handed coordination issues like popping a pill with one hand and chugging a drink with the other can be challenging.
3. COMPUTERING. Typing aside, the switch from righty mouse to lefty mouse borders on apocalyptic. It ain't happening. It's like being an American and then driving in England: it seems ok for a bit and then suddenly you're in the middle of some crazy wee village and there are cows everywhere and everything is backward and GAME OVER YOU DIED.
4. TOOTHBRUSH. I expected this to be easier, I really did. I was mistaken. This more than anything has pushed me to consider an electric toothbrush that would do the work for me. Still, this is better than...
5. THE TOILET. Really, the less said about this, the better.
6. THE SHOWER. Most casts are not water proof and cannot get wet, which means taking lots of actions to protect the cast while still doing the needful to stay clean and non-stinky. I have this giant arm condom courtesy of CVS which covers the whole arm and has a tight rubber seal at the top to keep water out. This is great, but does not address the issue of how you still only have one good arm for use in cleaning. Fun fact: it's tough to clean the left armpit with the left hand. Things just don't bend that way.
7. DRIVING. I'm lucky here, because I have an automatic. If I had a manual transmission I would be so screwed. I can barely get my seat belt on without help from Lefty. I pity anyone with a manual and a broken right arm, you are done, my friend. Done.
8. PUNCHING. Ok, so maybe this doesn't apply to everyone (and shouldn't, really), but this does put a serious crimp in my karate training. My arm doesn't quite move right to do a lot of motions, and sudden movements still hurt quite a lot. So my overall effectiveness is way down, which is tough when you're the teacher and have to demonstrate all the movements to everyone. On the other side, I'm doing a lot of drills one-handed, including drills that require two hands, and it terrifies the younger students that I can do with one hand something that is designed for two, especially with weapons involved.
9. HOUSEKEEPING. Washing dishes? Nope. Laundry? Very slow. Vacuuming and sweeping? Challenging. Cooking? Hahaha just kidding, I sucked at cooking way before this arm broke; nothing's really changed there. Shoveling snow? Snowpe. Chainsaw? HAHAHAHANope. Dusting and wiping down surfaces? Ah, there's a job for Lefty. Cleaning snow and ice off of car? Sllllooowwww. Trash? Thank god for these new wheeled trash cans, muuuuch better. So... not the best in the house right now. That will cost me.
10. WORK. I type a lot at work, so my first comment applies in full force here. But I also meet and greet a lot of people, which means I shake a lot of hands. My first instinct is always extend the hand. Even with my close friends where I've known them for eons, I still put out the hand and then turn it into a hug. But I can't stop my instinct, and so I've taken a lot of painful handshakes because I operate without thought. Cheeky handshakes. Need to work on my fistbump.
So, in summary, don't break your primary arm. It will suck.
0.5: TYPING. Before I start the real part of this list, let's be frank: I type a lot. With both hands, proper typing form and all that. Losing my right hand has led to...inaccuracies. So pardon any typos you see here; I've got one finger doing all the work of one hand and it will show.
1. LIFTING. I'm not a strong human being by any stretch of the imagination, but I can carry some weight if I need to. Surprise! Not any more! Any significant weight on this arm brings an equally significant amount of pain. Grocery bags? No deal. Winter jacket? Heavier than I thought. Laptop? CHUNKY. An add on to this category would be TWISTING or PULLING. If I keep my wrist stationary, nor problem, I can carry a glass of water without issue. BUT! If I have to pour water from a pitcher into the glass, now we have issues. Same with opening a door - turning the knob can be tricky, and then pulling the heavy door open with the hand twisted... nope. It's all up to Lefty.
2. EATING. I have, in the past week, missed my mouth with silverware more times than should ever be allowed. It's worse than Ted Stryker's drinking problem in "Airplane!" I suppose on the plus side it regulates my intake and slows me down when I want to shovel food into my gaping maw. Of course, non-silverware-requisite items like sandwiches and cookies are exempt from this issue. But two-handed coordination issues like popping a pill with one hand and chugging a drink with the other can be challenging.
3. COMPUTERING. Typing aside, the switch from righty mouse to lefty mouse borders on apocalyptic. It ain't happening. It's like being an American and then driving in England: it seems ok for a bit and then suddenly you're in the middle of some crazy wee village and there are cows everywhere and everything is backward and GAME OVER YOU DIED.
4. TOOTHBRUSH. I expected this to be easier, I really did. I was mistaken. This more than anything has pushed me to consider an electric toothbrush that would do the work for me. Still, this is better than...
5. THE TOILET. Really, the less said about this, the better.
6. THE SHOWER. Most casts are not water proof and cannot get wet, which means taking lots of actions to protect the cast while still doing the needful to stay clean and non-stinky. I have this giant arm condom courtesy of CVS which covers the whole arm and has a tight rubber seal at the top to keep water out. This is great, but does not address the issue of how you still only have one good arm for use in cleaning. Fun fact: it's tough to clean the left armpit with the left hand. Things just don't bend that way.
7. DRIVING. I'm lucky here, because I have an automatic. If I had a manual transmission I would be so screwed. I can barely get my seat belt on without help from Lefty. I pity anyone with a manual and a broken right arm, you are done, my friend. Done.
8. PUNCHING. Ok, so maybe this doesn't apply to everyone (and shouldn't, really), but this does put a serious crimp in my karate training. My arm doesn't quite move right to do a lot of motions, and sudden movements still hurt quite a lot. So my overall effectiveness is way down, which is tough when you're the teacher and have to demonstrate all the movements to everyone. On the other side, I'm doing a lot of drills one-handed, including drills that require two hands, and it terrifies the younger students that I can do with one hand something that is designed for two, especially with weapons involved.
9. HOUSEKEEPING. Washing dishes? Nope. Laundry? Very slow. Vacuuming and sweeping? Challenging. Cooking? Hahaha just kidding, I sucked at cooking way before this arm broke; nothing's really changed there. Shoveling snow? Snowpe. Chainsaw? HAHAHAHANope. Dusting and wiping down surfaces? Ah, there's a job for Lefty. Cleaning snow and ice off of car? Sllllooowwww. Trash? Thank god for these new wheeled trash cans, muuuuch better. So... not the best in the house right now. That will cost me.
10. WORK. I type a lot at work, so my first comment applies in full force here. But I also meet and greet a lot of people, which means I shake a lot of hands. My first instinct is always extend the hand. Even with my close friends where I've known them for eons, I still put out the hand and then turn it into a hug. But I can't stop my instinct, and so I've taken a lot of painful handshakes because I operate without thought. Cheeky handshakes. Need to work on my fistbump.
So, in summary, don't break your primary arm. It will suck.
Starting The Year Off With A Bang!
Jan. 9th, 2019 11:36 amThe phrase 'sometimes I make poor life choices' is pretty much a descriptor of the past 110% of my life. As the following picture shows, this weekend was no exception.
Let's make no bones about it, this hurts a lot. I'll have to take a break from the physical for a while. But don't let this cast me in a bad light; it hasn't shattered my resolve to keep at it.
Also, for the record, I have done this once before successfully, without injury. I just messed up a wee bit this time, and it cost me.
Wheeeeee!
Let's make no bones about it, this hurts a lot. I'll have to take a break from the physical for a while. But don't let this cast me in a bad light; it hasn't shattered my resolve to keep at it.
Also, for the record, I have done this once before successfully, without injury. I just messed up a wee bit this time, and it cost me.
Wheeeeee!
Actually nothing special is happening. I'm just writing to say WHEEEEEEEE
Also I guess I'm writing to say the end of October does mean candy, but it also means NaNoWriMo for those folks who just write once a year because they're lazy lumps. That would be me. So away I go! I have a plan and an outline and everything, which means absolutely nothing but who's counting?
Also also, I really need to write up some old travelogues. Haven't even finished one of the old ones, and since then I've been to Yellowstone and Ecuador and maybe some other weird place. This of course is brought to my mind because I'm going to Morocco next month, so maybe I should get with the program.
Also also also, it's 2:00 in the office and I feel like a large quantity of wine is needed to pass this day along. But then I'd just run around with a pair of giant scissors and try to cut things and people, so it's better that I not follow this course.
Also4 it's been a week of seeing old friends again, which makes me happy.
Also5, I really do have a pair of giant scissors. 
