[personal profile] chaosvizier
Kevin Smith says "Watch my movie or not, but don't be a bitch like Joel Siegel!" And that's fair enough- if you like his movies or his style, you'll probably give his films a shot. And if you don't then you won't.

We did.

Clerks II



Kevin Smith uses his films to unleash a torrent of commentary on the masses. Social and religious issues are dealt with the same hand that takes on geeky fandom and sexual aberration. All are treated with humor to cover either the sarcastic realism or the realistic sarcasm inherent in his dialogue. Fans of Kevin Smith have watched Clerks, where a convenience store becomes a window into the lives of everyone who passes by, taking on smoking, drugs, sex, Star Wars, and a dozen other topics in a loosely linked plot. Fast forward ten years to... this.

I'd say Smith's movies are an acquired taste. They definitely won't appeal to everyone. They are often coarse and edgy; not much is held back. Similar in a way to the methods of Trey Parker and Matt Stone- interesting messages hidden under a veneer of harsh vulgarity. Clerks II is not as fantastically religious as Dogma or as simple as Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back; it is much as Clerks I was- a day in the life of a fast food restaurant. A special day for all characters involved, though.

The plot: I just said it, duh.

The pros: There are a lot of laughs to be had here. Kevin Smith's dialogue and direction is spot on, making the comedic scenes worth their weight in gold. Watching Randal's face during the "pussy troll" scene was as funny as the rest of the scene itself. Waging a geek war between LOTR and Star Wars fans is... geektacular. A Jackson Five dance interlude is unexpected and yet still funny. Taking back "porch monkey"... soliciting a donkey sex show... the hacks on Fast Food, Mooby style... anything Jay and Silent Bob do, in their own style (but especially the "Silene of the Lambs" copy)... pretty much every scene was worth a laugh from me. It's all tied in with a loose story about Dante's departure and his choice to "move on" with his life, and with a moral of finding out what's really important, and so on, but come on, it's all about the jokes. Even Lo Pan would have cackled here.

The cons: Well, it is all about the jokes. The story is simple and meaningful, but it is covered with a layer of raw crude that might offend... well, lots of folks. It really is up to the viewer's taste to determine what's tolerable and what's not. Such is the way with obscene humor. I personally was grossed out during the donkey sex scene; I guess it's interesting to discover the limits to one's stomach. Now I know to cross off "donkey sex" from my list of Acceptable Movie Activities. Learn something new every day, eh?

The verdict: I suspect that if you are a Kevin Smith fan, you will enjoy the continued antics of his characters. If not, you might still be surprised to find something interesting here if you look carefully.

Disclaimer: At the end of the credits, Kevin Smith lists all of his MySpace friends. We sat and read through them all because we are COMPLETE LOSERS.

Disclaimer: In the credits, we came upon the name of the Second Second Assistant Director: September Death. Tell me RIGHT NOW that that is not the greatest name in history.

Date: 2006-07-25 05:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dorei.livejournal.com
September Death is a very cool name. :)

Date: 2006-07-25 07:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chaosvizier.livejournal.com
They just need to marry someone named April and have twin daughters, May and June. And maybe their Roman sons Augustus and Julius.

And their bastard cousin Gregory.

Date: 2006-07-25 06:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] the-wanlorn.livejournal.com
So, what so you think of the pussy troll part? Is Randal just a phenomenal actor, or did they tell him "Okay, here's what you say, then he says something, and you just go on ahead and react."?

We're thinking the latter, 'cause it was just too perfect.

I have never laughed in a movie theater before, but I laughed throughout the entirety of Clerks II, so hard that I almost threw up many times.

Date: 2006-07-25 07:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chaosvizier.livejournal.com
The pussy troll bit had us dying. Probably the funniest scene in the movie, which is a difficult category to judge.

Date: 2006-07-25 07:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drradium.livejournal.com
I wasn't going to see this movie but since you have provided me with donkey sex I must see it now.

Secondly, my friend Vicky worked on this movie!!

Date: 2006-07-25 07:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chaosvizier.livejournal.com
Now if Vicky worked with Mr. Death, that would be pretty damn awesome.

As it stands, though, Donkey Sex. It's there.
(deleted comment)

Date: 2006-07-26 05:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chaosvizier.livejournal.com
And here I was thinking, "Yeah, my name's Hans, that's pretty badass in this country" but no, September Death trumps me by leaps and bounds.

Date: 2006-07-29 03:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] richcsigs.livejournal.com
Your name will always be Iron Mountain to me. :)

Date: 2006-07-29 03:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chaosvizier.livejournal.com
To you, and to many others. Fear the power!

Date: 2006-07-26 02:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fizrep.livejournal.com
Like the blind girl/serial killer blowjob scene was for me, you have finally met your cinematic match with Kinky Kelly.

Date: 2006-07-26 05:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chaosvizier.livejournal.com
It was indeed. I got Donkey Punched.

Date: 2006-07-26 04:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ohioswimmer.livejournal.com
I enjoyed the movie, but I think I enjoyed your review even more! +

Date: 2006-07-26 05:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chaosvizier.livejournal.com
Well, I'm nowhere near as funny as Kevin Smith. I'm just conveying the sense of his funniness here. ;-)

Yeah...

Date: 2006-07-30 06:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jacesan.livejournal.com
I wouldn't recommend this movie to anyone unless they're already a Kevin Smith fan. He's too "in your face".

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