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Apr. 28th, 2004 08:44 amAs I was driving home last night, I noticed that it was snowing.
"How odd," I thought to myself, it being late April and all. Snow was definitely not a likely weather pattern for any part of the tri-state area. And yet the evidence was there before my eyes, small white particles illuminated by the streetlamps, floating through the night air. Extra-weird, I say!
But a more thorough examination of the evidence showed not a cloud in the sky, which would have been a prerequisite for any kind of precipitation, least of all snow. And it was warm, too warm for icy crystals to remain intact. So where were these white things coming from? And, if not snow, then what were they?
Well, I haven't watched a season of Law And Order without developing a few detective skills. It turns out that the white particles were emanating from an 18-wheeler several car lengths ahead of me. I couldn't make out the cargo clearly from the back, so I accelerated and pulled along side the truck to see if I could identify the source.
At that point, I wish to God I had had a camera to prove what I'm about to say.
The truck was full of ducks.
There must have been about seven or eight layers of cages stacked on this truck. Each layer had to have been about twenty cages long and maybe six cages wide. And each cage had several large white ducks in it. I could hear the quacking when I opened my passenger-side window that was facing the duck truck. The white particles? Feathers being blown off the ducks as the truck blew down the highway at around 80 mph.
You can't make this shit up.
EDIT: I have to make an amendment to this story, now that I just remembered the other slightly amusing thought I had at the time. The truck was just one in a line of several trucks, because they usually travel in packs. It's part of the truck ecosystem. Anyway, the truck immediately behind the duck truck was a petrol tanker. Needless to say, a vision of a sudden and violent intersection of the two vehicles left my mouth watering with the possibility of a whole shitload of flame-broiled duckies. Mmmmm, mmmmm, good.
"How odd," I thought to myself, it being late April and all. Snow was definitely not a likely weather pattern for any part of the tri-state area. And yet the evidence was there before my eyes, small white particles illuminated by the streetlamps, floating through the night air. Extra-weird, I say!
But a more thorough examination of the evidence showed not a cloud in the sky, which would have been a prerequisite for any kind of precipitation, least of all snow. And it was warm, too warm for icy crystals to remain intact. So where were these white things coming from? And, if not snow, then what were they?
Well, I haven't watched a season of Law And Order without developing a few detective skills. It turns out that the white particles were emanating from an 18-wheeler several car lengths ahead of me. I couldn't make out the cargo clearly from the back, so I accelerated and pulled along side the truck to see if I could identify the source.
At that point, I wish to God I had had a camera to prove what I'm about to say.
The truck was full of ducks.
There must have been about seven or eight layers of cages stacked on this truck. Each layer had to have been about twenty cages long and maybe six cages wide. And each cage had several large white ducks in it. I could hear the quacking when I opened my passenger-side window that was facing the duck truck. The white particles? Feathers being blown off the ducks as the truck blew down the highway at around 80 mph.
You can't make this shit up.
EDIT: I have to make an amendment to this story, now that I just remembered the other slightly amusing thought I had at the time. The truck was just one in a line of several trucks, because they usually travel in packs. It's part of the truck ecosystem. Anyway, the truck immediately behind the duck truck was a petrol tanker. Needless to say, a vision of a sudden and violent intersection of the two vehicles left my mouth watering with the possibility of a whole shitload of flame-broiled duckies. Mmmmm, mmmmm, good.
