The Interview Meme Returns!

[chaosvizier]

Here are the instructions:

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. l respond by asking you five questions.
3. You update your LJ with the answers to the questions. Include this explanation and an offer to interview others.
4. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.



First interview: chlaal!

1. How do you look in drag?
I barely look decent in my own clothes; I fear to imagine the horror if I attempted to don raiments normally intended for the opposite sex. Except maybe skirt-pants.

2. Name one thing your job has taught you about international relations.
It's that people are all the same, in a sense. There are nice people in every country, and there are assholes in every country. Black or white, liberal or conservative, Christian or Muslim, every country and every people has every spectrum covered. Also, don't judge a nation by its leader. This applies to almost every country on Earth.

3. If you had to leave New York tomorrow and never come back, what would you do in the city today on your last day there?
I would have to find a way to eat in as many good restaurants and eateries as possible, and following that, drink in as many good drinkeries as possible. Following that, maybe some Advil.

4. Which would you rather visit and why -- the Moon, or the deepest heart of the Amazon jungle?
Tricky. Both have a very strong appeal. I suppose, given the chance, I'd choose the Moon, simply because it's much more inaccessible and completely alien. But it would be a difficult choice.

5. What the hell IS it about that llama song??
It's cuz those llamas are just so darn cute!


Second interview: kokopellinelli!

1. If the world ran out of gin, what would you drink?
Looks like me and another hundred-gallon drum of Godiva Chocolate Liqueur. Mmmmm... sweet and tasty. And great on ice cream. Or coffee. Or hot chocolate. Or milkshakes. Mmmmm...

2. If you could only go to one place on vacation the rest of your life, what would it be?
Tough one. Either Japan or Australia. They're big enough that it would take some time to go through, and they're interesting all over. Lots to see. Japan does have more ninjas, though. That puts them a bit ahead, because ninjas are awesome.

3. If you could be an already-existing superhero, who would it be?
Probably The Punisher. He's shadowy, fights crime, and then wastes the criminals. Makes sure they never get up again. A bit meaner than Batman. I can handle that.

4. Who is the celebrity you think most looks like you?
Gary Oldman, I think. Especially if you look at him as Commissioner Gordon in the new Batman movie. Or, when I had long hair, like Sirius Black.

5. What's your favorite animal?
Raccoons are cool. They've got wee hands, they're kinda cute (albeit cranky), they're a bit clever, and they're still cute and cranky. They're like me, only with more hair.


Third interview: silent_r_infork

1. Describe the five hottest female superheroes fighting to the death for your love.
Hmm. Psylocke (Marvel), Batgirl/Oracle (DC), The Engineer (Image), Fahrenheit (Image), and Mystique (Marvel). I'm hoping The Engineer gets the final blow (pun intended), although Mystique's ability to be anybody does have its charms. I'm open.

2. Have you ever hit anyone with a sock full of quarters, or at least considered it?
Consider it? Every day. Maybe even every hour. Actually do it? Not yet. I did hit someone in the head with a wooden stick though. That was satisfying.

3. Did you like Charles Bronson's "Death Wish"?
Yes. Death Wish was good. Death Wish 4 might have been a bit much; there's only so much death one can wish for, even with Charles Bronson involved.

4. What would happen if you had your consciousness put into a giant robot?
The weather forecast is Slightly Lethal with a chance of OMGWTFDEATH. Seriously, that sort of operation never goes well, and in my case it would be no exception. I would go fuck some shit up. I might start with Newark, NJ, just because no one will miss it. It'll be good practice.

5. Coolest experience at a concert/music-related event?
This would be the part where I say I had sex with Christina Aguilera afterwards, but since that never happened, I'll mention the time I got hired to be a bouncer for a Reba Macintyre show. That was a long time ago.


Fourth interview: marasca!

1. What's so great about New Jersey, anyhow?
Ok, aside from the fact that I grew up here, for my purposes it does everything I need. I'm not a city dweller- I'm not really good inside a hard-core metropolis. I need a bit of space, but at the same time a bit of civilization. NJ does, surprisingly enough, fit that bill. Also, it is central to several major metropoles- NYC, Philly, DC/Baltimore, even Boston. Certainly there are crappy parts of the state, but you know what? Every state has crappy parts. Truth.

2. That night when you got too drunk at a U.N. party and projectile vomited on Cheney, giving him another heart attack got you banned from working at the U.N. or in international relations stuff ever again. What kind of job do you seek?
Well... I might seek a job in information technology. I don't have any college degrees in it, but I've taken a bunch of training classes that might help, and what the hell, I like computers anyway. Barring that, if the world were perfect, maybe I'd finally open up a martial arts school, although at the moment I'm not yet ready for that step.

3. That night also got you exiled from the NY/NJ/CT area. Where do you move?
Hmm. I could see myself moving to Europe. Germany/Switzerland is a nice region; I'm familiar with the language and geography, and given a bit of time I could probably get myself more or less fully integrated into the local society. I do like the East coast better than the West, and certainly much better than the central non-coastal US.

4. I'm still hooked on Bejeweled, you bastard! I broke a million points on Action mode the other night. But I'm much better now about just playing a game or two and then moving on with my life. Can you recommend another casual video game I might like? (none of the epic stuff like Diablo or Civ, just something I can (theoretically) play for 15 or 20 minutes and then walk away from)
I like the Bejeweled class of "puzzle" games. I play them all the time on MSN. They're fun, somewhat addictive, and yet still simple enough that you can play one game or two in ten minutes and feel good and relaxed. If you hit up http://zone.msn.com, you'll find oodles of puzzle games, many of which I play frequently. Zuma and Luxor got me hooked as well. Also, Dynomite and Rocket Mania.

5. Name 5 healthy foods that you like.
Believe it or not, I do like a good salad now and then. Very often for lunch I'll get the cafeteria's salad and antipasta selections. When it comes to vegetables, I much prefer them raw; I despise cooked veggies. So let's go with Salad, Raw veggies, some kinds of fish (I hear they're healthy and full of Omega 3's or something), Pasta (it doesn't have to be smothered in unhealthy cheese; even plain pasta is good), and... well, let's pretend those tofu brownies you made for my birthday are healthy, because I have to admit, they were good. ;-)


Fifth interview: deza!

1. What do you see yourself doing five years from today?
Have to admit, I don't see a huge amount of change. I am notoriously resistant to it. I like my job, and in five years hopefully I'll have a promotion that brings me to the one job in my office that I really want. I'll still be studying and teaching karate because I love it. And that's it. Basically, if I'm not dead, then I'll be the same.

2. Cage match to the death, Harriet Miers and Paris Hilton. Who walks away, maimed beyond recognition, and who is left in a steaming pile of entrails?
Hmm. Maybe Paris learned a few things doing hard time, and will bust up the old lady and shiv her. That would actually be quite amusing. I'd almost respect Paris for that.
...Almost.

3. If you ever moved away from the NYC area, what would you miss most?
Convenience. NYC has one of the best Mass Transit systems I've seen in any city, ever. It is also logically constructed, mostly adhering to the "grid" pattern that makes navigation simple. It has everything, culturally, and a lot of it. It's a very all-encompassing and easy city.

4. Robots, pirates, ninjas or zombies?
For the most part, ninjas. The one exception would be Transformers, because they put the "bad-ass" in "robot".

5. You wanna?
Sure I wanna! Don't you?


Sixth interview: b_hulsmans!

1. What's with all the pudding?
Pudding is good. Suddenly I forget exactly how pudding became a standing joke, but hey, you really can't go wrong with pudding. Rice pudding, jello pudding, sticky toffee pudding... I even accept black pudding.

2. When will you make a LJDQ I can actually answer all the questions to?
That would be too easy! Besides, who cares about knowing the answers? It's all about making fun of something.

3. What's cool about New Jersey?
Location. By itself, the Garden State does not boast any major metropoles, but it is very close to NYC, Philadelphia, Washington DC, Baltimore, and Boston, and it does have certain places of natural charm for folks nearby. Also, Great Adventure, the greatest roller coaster theme park ever made. Atlantic City is shiny and fun for those into that kind of thing. The Jersey Shore and accompanying boardwalk are an interesting slice of summertime culture.

4. What's your favorite movie of all time?
This is such a difficult question. There are a lot of movies that I would gladly watch over and over and over again. I suppose in terms of pure quality, I'd have to say "The Fugitive" with Harrison Ford and Tommy Lee Jones.

5. What do you think the last sentence will be in the 7th Harry Potter book?
"'All this time, they never suspected me, and now they pay the price,'" whispered Hagrid evilly as he surveyed their ruined corpses."
...hey, a guy can dream, right?


Seventh interview: sskipstress!

1. Was Cornell your first choice for college? Was there another school to which you applied that in retrospect you think might have been a better choice for you? Why or why not?
Cornell was my first choice, but I did not get in on the first try. I transferred in from Rensselaer. In retrospect, I still think Cornell was the best choice.

2. If you couldn't live and work where you do now, where would you live and work?
Switzerland. It's nice, it's pretty, it's central to all of Europe, and Swiss women are hotties.

3. Tell me about the last good book you read.
I recently finished Philip Pullman's "His Dark Materials" trilogy. The first book, "The Golden Compass" (movie due in December), is the best of the trilogy, and I really enjoyed it. The other two books were less enthralling, except maybe some of the battle scenes.

4. What is your favorite kind of sushi and why do you like it so much?
I love the taste of salmon, but more than that I love the salty smooth taste of mackerel. Well-made squid is excellent too. I do like the salmon roe because all those juicy spheres popping in my mouth feels like weird candy. But ultimately, eel is the best of all.

5. If you had to give up alcohol or caffeine, which one would it be? Why?
Caffeine. Its effects on me are negligible, and caffeine free drinks don't really taste any different. Plus, alcohol is just more fun.


Eighth interview: djsynrgy

1. You can use your chaos-fu to layeth the smacketh down on anyone in the universe. Living though, no dead, and no fictional characters. Who needs a beating?
Now most folks would say George W. Bush, and maybe they're right. But that's too obvious and easy an answer. There are people who are just plain full-on jackasses, and Fred Phelps is one of them. The beating that should be laid upon him has never been seen before on this Earth.

2. (insert title here) was without a doubt the WORST movie ever (not in the awesomely bad way, but in the 'it made me want to projectile vomit' way.), and this is why:
"Fargo". It was Boring. And DUMB. It did not grab my attention. It did not endear me to anything or anyone. It did not hold my interest, or even attract it. It was not funny. It was not serious. It was, literally, nothing.

3. What, to date, has been pop cultures greatest interpretation of ninjas and on what do you base this claim?
I actually think Batman is the greatest ninja ever. He is the true master of power through stealth and fear, of victory through deception, of covert operation, of fighting prowess, and of unfeeling intention to complete his mandate. While the traditional ninja uses the weapons of the old-school martial artists, were they to upgrade to the 21st century, they would most assuredly all be Batman.

4. You have your significant others' permission and can have a threesome with anyone you want. (same rules as question number 1) Who do you choose?
Rachel Weisz (preferably before she got knocked up) and Kirsten Dunst. Mmmmmmmmmm... oh yeah.

5. I was gonna ask about comic based movies, but I changed my mind. What in your mind is the best CHICK FLICK you've ever seen, and why?
Hmm. I think "Love, Actually" is the best chick flick I've ever seen. Mostly because it's all British, and somehow that makes it better. I'll give props to "Benny and Joon", however. That comes in second.


Ninth interview: tickle_smoosh!

1. If you could choose your own death, how would you die and why?
This is that tricky question where I'm supposed to say "nonstop sex until my heart stopped." But barring that, I'd like either an instantaneous death where I didn't even know what was happening, or I'd like to go down in hand to hand combat and take a bunch of fools with me.

2. If you were stranded on a desert island, who would you want with you and why?
Again, you're trying to lure me into the "nonstop sex on a desert island until my heart stopped" trap. And... hmmm... well, that doesn't sound so bad here.

3. If you found out Darth Vader was your father, what would you yell out to the heavens and why?
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! YOU COULD HAVE PAID FOR MY COLLEGE TUITION! I KNOW YOU'RE LOADED! WHY?????"

4. If you had a million dollars, what are the 3 things you would do with your money and why?
1. Buy house. Nothing super-expensive, just moderate enough to live in and be happy.
2. Pay off all debts, because they're annoying.
3. Celebrate by going out and having a tremendous amount of really good sushi, washing it down with equally good sake.

5. Cheese: discuss.
Cheese is good. I'm a fan of most cheeses (cottage cheese, cream cheese, and this abomination are distinct exceptions). Blue cheeses are great, creamy brie class cheeses are great, smoked cheese like gouda are good, cheese fondue is yummy... I'm not a master of cheese lore, but I like to eat the stuff. So, for the most part, cheese can do no wrong.


Tenth interview: deza, again!

1. Planning any more scavenger hunts?
This one was pretty much off the cuff- Ang surprised us with the idea, and we just rolled with it because it sounded like fun. Having done it, I am pretty sure that I would love to do it again. It was just buckets of fun, once we really got going. I'll have to look into more such things- someone mentioned that there was a similar thing that took place in Brooklyn.

2. You want I should just ship you a pie sometime?
Would I want such a thing? Absolutely; I am a dedicated lover of pies. Would I insist that you do such a thing? No, I couldn't. I would much rather meet you in person for pie. Besides, I'd feel guilty because I wouldn't be able to send something back in return. You most certainly would NOT want me to prepare any kind of foodstuff. No ma'am.

3. What does it take to bend the spoon?
It takes A) one spoon and B) one blowtorch. A few passes with the flame in the middle of the spoon should soften the metal enough for it to become more flexible. Given a plastic spoon, a blowtorch is excessive; a simple match or lighter will provide the heat needed to generate flexibility. Uri Geller can stuff it.

4. What alcohol goes best with small child innards?
A very thorough braising with red wine would probably serve as an excellent flavor enhancer, coq au vin style. But that's more of a marinade. In terms of something to actually drink, I think those with sharp tongues would prefer a Jack and Coke, while softer tongues may prefer a Screwdriver or Vodka Cranberry. Personally, though, a gin and tonic is NEVER the wrong answer.

5. Robot, ninja, pirate or zombie? Oh, crap, I've asked you that before. Eh, who cares--answer it again.
After considerable thought, I still agree that ninjas are awesome and I would want to be one or emulate one. Robots do haver their time and place and awesomeness, and pirates have a certain flair about them that is not to be denied. But, ultimately, ninjas.